I got chris browned last night
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Randomize
