North Korea, Best Korea!
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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