What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
