we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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