Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
