NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
