This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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