So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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