I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
