If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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