yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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