You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
