Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
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