nut hugger
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Randomize