was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
