Your mouth is God's brothel.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
