And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
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