There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Randomize
