didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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