in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Couch. On fire.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
