Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
she peed on how many people?
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
