But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
