...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
