Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
try to milk me bitch
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