i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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