yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
