I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
