Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
