wrigley field is MILF paradise
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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