Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
