I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
