There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
