i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
tell me about the fingering
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