I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
Randomize
