Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Randomize
