when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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