Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
