His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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