I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
