he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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