Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
