last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
