Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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