Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
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