By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Randomize
