so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
