If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
