hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Randomize
