She is in my trunk
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I didn't notice because vodka
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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