she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
You should frame my arrest warrant.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
