We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
