But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
